That’s what I think anyhow. It kind of depends on who you were cracked by doesn’t it? I would go into Humpty-Dumpty but that would be childish, huh? Once you have a firm grip on the rest of your life is when the grease oozes out on the handle you are gripping. Then the machine sucks you in and deposits your remains in the Earth someplace you probably never heard of. I have handled corpses and none of them congratulated themselves on how well they did. Funny, ha-ha. Aren’t you glad you’re not me?
I am. Were I me I would be wealthy, with estates in the vineyards of southern France. I would jet there whenever I wanted and sip whatever wine was recommended. I don’t drink so that bubble burst almost before I typed those words. Nah, I am content to still be here because there is something to be said for not being dead. Or is there? Don’t try to ask a dead person unless you’re daft. Daft is partly what I am and I don’t try to hide it as daft looks good on me and my wife enjoys it to a degree or up to the point she tells me to shut the hell up. The cat says nothing. That’s a great cat! A Maine-coon. Sweetest animal I’ve ever known and I have known my share of animals over the years.
What do you plan to do with the rest of your life? It isn’t promised you know? One second can be the rest of your life but I certainly hope it isn’t. I need all the readers I can get. I know what you’re wondering: How did this old fart get so testy today? It isn’t today, it is all the yesterdays. I won’t go down in history so I make myself known now and the whole world gets to know that I am a daft old buzzard and I could care less. I already know I won’t have a statue sculpted of me though I deserve it for reasons I have yet to make up. Reasons.
What is the reason I write this today? Mainly because it isn’t yesterday or tomorrow. It is today and tomorrow will come, I am fairly certain, though not positive. I write this today because I need to change up what I write or I grow as stale as a slice of bread lost in the back of the cupboard last year. I am reasonably certain that you know what I mean. We all have a bit of sloppiness in common even if we won’t admit it to our friends. They know though, don’t they. Mine do and I will place a bet that yours do also. It is just that they are probably nicer than I am. Oh well, it is time to go peddle my papers isn’t it. See you tomorrow?
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